How does one “Re-Write the Story of Their Life?” This is the second in a three-part series I wrote in 2012 for The Spirited Woman. In part two I challenge us all to engage in the moment at hand.
by Andrea Chilcote
Re-telling the story of your life requires examining the story you are living today. Even if – perhaps especially if – you are in transition, you are writing the story of your life right now, with each thought you have and each breath you take.
Many years ago I was living in a seemingly foreign place, away from my husband and four-legged family, finishing out a commitment to a job while anticipating a move to start my business. I was both exhilarated and terrified about my future, and anxious to be finished with my current assignment. And, I was lonely.
In hindsight, I learned a lesson. I had put my life “on hold,” working too much at a job that was unfulfilling, longing to be with my family, and obsessing about the future. Toward the end of the eight month period, I met a young family who invited me into their life. This brief experience helped me recognize that I had squandered the precious present moment far too long. Rather than engaging in life where I was, I had been living in a world of “what-if’s,” an uncomfortable mental state in which I was trying to hold on to what had really ended while unable to step fully into my future.
Change expert William Bridges suggests that in any transition, we experience a stage of letting go, then a stage of neutrality in which nothing feels grounded or clear; finally, those two stages are followed by a period of orienting to new beginnings. I suggest, while these are natural stages we must pass through, we can continue to live the story of a meaningful life even inside the so-called neutral zone. It’s as simple as showing up.
Are you telling yourself a story about a past that’s over or a future that has not yet arrived? What story would you tell about your life right now? You have a choice to live a life of engagement and vitality. Even if you would rather be somewhere else, what can you do today, this moment even, to come alive again?
The fleeting present moment is filled with potential opportunities and possibilities, yet we often miss them because we’re consumed by a mind cluttered with thoughts about the past or the future. Stop – then look, listen and feel. Are you willing to engage in the precious opportunity before you?
Read parts one and three on The Spirited Woman site.